Sue Townsend is continuing Adrian Mole’s adventures in her topical Guardian column — Adrian Mole is the fictional character whose fantastic “secret diaries” are UK classics and my personal angst bible.

Dear Mr Mole,

In this time of national crises, it is incumbent on us all to support our government. During a senior pupils debate, chaired by myself, your son Glenn succeeded in undermining the morale of teachers and pupils alike by his passionate denunciation of the bombing of Afghanistan. He also called our great leader, Mr Blair, ‘a leading Twat’. I have therefore excluded him from the school premises for the duration of the war.

I hope to God (or Allah) that the war will be over by Christmas. I can’t have Glenn hanging around the house all day. It is imperative that I finish my post-twin towers novel quickly. The book (as yet no publisher) must be ready for publication in the spring.

Glenn protested his innocence, saying, “I didn’t say Tony Blair was a leading twat. I said he was leading TWAT (The War Against Terrorism).”

LinkDiscuss (via LinkMachineGo)